kaka

...inis
...init ng ulo
...badtrip

konti na lang talaga... sasabog na ako.

WAAAAH! so much for trying to be stress free!

please lang talaga, paabutin ako ng Disyembre. konting kembot na lang baka mapatumbling pa ako.

 

friends

Source: http://xkcd.com/513/

inspirasyon

madalas nase-stress ako sa office. dahil sa pressure na kailangang makabenta at kailangan maayos ang mga problema. kung titingnan mo ang mesa ko, ganito ang itsura niya:

to keep me sane, meron akong mga post it notes with inspirational messages!  tadaaaaaa!

but wait, there's more! 

ikaw? anong itsura ng desk mo? :) 

gravity

Gravity is working against me
And gravity wants to bring me down

Oh I'll never know what makes this man
With all the love that his heart can stand
Dream of ways to throw it all away

Oh Gravity is working against me
And gravity wants to bring me down

Oh twice as much aint twice as good
And can't sustain like one half could
It's wanting more
That's gonna send me to my knees
(repeat)

Oh gravity, stay the hell away from me
And gravity has taken better men than me (Now how can that be?)

Just keep me where the light is
Just keep me where the light is
Just keep me where the light is
Come on, keep me where the light is
Come on, keep me where the light is
Away from all the dark
Keep me where the light is
Keep me where, keep me where the light is

:(

of closing cycles and moving on

i dub this year...year of closures.

this year, i did not list any specific goals that i wanted to achieve except that i told myself that i want to fix my life...psychological/emotional/mental aspects of it at the least. it was driving me mad and hindering me from moving forward.

it was not planned but i guess the universe has a way of giving you what you want. it may not be during the time that you want it or in the manner that you imagined it to happen. but still, it will.

what started out as a catch-up dinner among friends became one quirky confrontation of sorts. this was with my first suitor. i decided to just avoid him altogether so that i don't have to talk to him and tell him that i'm turning him down. and this dates 11 years back! and now he gets the answers to his questions...talk about facing your fears.

second wave was when i was given a chance to talk with my first ever boyfriend during a recent outing. i guess that relationship set the tone for the next ones. i would say it was kind of traumatic to the point that it forced me to make extreme decisions on my next relationship. it feels great to get things off your chest and to finally accept things which you never thought would happen.

i don't know if i should expect more of these things to happen before the year ends. but in case they do, i would say...bring it on! :)


ps...couldn't start working without writing this. i just needed to get it off my chest.

infected

for somebody selling security solutions, napaka-ironic. ako pa ang na-virus! kung sinuswerte ka nga naman. 2 days na akong walang magawa sa laptop ko! ang masaklap pa diyan, pati yun personal external HD ko nainfect din! kalerkeeeeey!

ang dilemma ko, kung iopen ko yun files ko at magwork then mag-send ako sa mga officemates ko, malamang mainfect din sila. kapag di ko naman ginawa yun, e di ako naman ang lagot dahil wala akong report.

bakit ba ganyan ang life? minsan bulok na lemons ang binibigay. paano mo naman gagawing lemonade?

teardrops on my pillow

favorite expression yan nung ex-officemate kong bading para sabihin na crayola (iiyak = cry) na naman siya. at lately ito ang drama ng buhay ko.

minsan ayoko na mag-isip. dahil sa kakaisip, lalong maraming naiisip. (magulo ba? ok lang yan. ako rin naguguluhan eh.)

sa dinami-dami ng mga depression mode periods ko, ewan ko ba bakit hindi ako magsawa-sawa. lagi na lang akong may maiisip na ikakadepress ko. nasisiraan na talaga yata ako ng bait. siguro nagkapatong-patong lang. hindi na kita ibobother with details dahil baka pati ikaw, maloka rin. pero gusto ko lang ilabas at umasang sa pagsabi kong ito, mabawasan yun bigat na nararamdaman ko.

hinga lang muna.

Sign Seeker

have you ever asked for one? i know i did! :) watch this. it's a great clip from Nestle.

waaaaaah!

i just wanted to shout to the world. everything's a blur. please let me get through this.

in search of piggies

i still haven't found the piggies i was looking for my birthday project. :( SM department store and Toy Kingdom turned out to be major duds.

WHERE HAVE ALL THE DECENT PIGGY BANKS GONE?

workaholic. yes?

i think i am.

or i maybe i just like torturing myself by "pretending" to work at this hour.

i still can't sleep. :(

Linda Blair

lately, lagi kong napapakinggan sa umaga ang isang upbeat song na hindi ko maintindihan. basta alam ko may pa-sway-sway pa ako ng ulo tuwing maririnig ko ang intro. at hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi ko rin naisip iresearch kung ano ba yung kanta na yun. finally nahanap ko na siya kanina. Linda Blair pala ni Tanya Markova.

kakaaliw lang. :)