The other day, I was chatting with a friend and it came to a point where I told him that I already wanted to get married because I was scared of not being able to conceive especially because I have a thyroid problem.
The truth was, I was scared. But not because of not being able to have kids. But because I am scared that nobody would want me for me. Silly right?
I'm insecure when it comes to that. Sometimes I feel that I'm a bad person that I won't find a person that will stick with me once he gets to know the real me. I know I shouldn't let my past relationship failures get to me but sometimes I cannot help it.
So now, I'm taking it one step at a time. After all, it has been almost a year since Pitt left and we're still together. Although most of the time I wish he was here, I'm glad I had the chance to be alone and reflect on thoughts that I have been ignoring for so long.
It isn't so bad after all.