what ifs, what is and what will be

while reading the newspaper early this morning, i came across and article about a certain NGO that i applied for and turned down just before i was about to start working. what caught my attention was a picture of the staff. one of them was the person whom i replaced in my current job.

how small can the world be?!

this little thing led me to a whole morning of reflection on how one's choices (no matter how small or big they may be) can really make a difference in one's life. it was like the world was telling me something at that particular moment.

i'm not quite sure if there is a connection to the fact that i have just finished reading "The Giver" which my babuy gave me as a Valentine gift (thank you very much!) and we had just watched "Memoirs of a Geisha" the night before. both things made me think about the choices that i have made in my life. maybe it was the timing of all three that pushed me acknowledge that i had to voice it out.

i started going back to the time i resigned from my previous job. a month after, i immediately, got accepted in this NGO but just after accepting the position, i got a call from a certain company that i am on the last leg of my series of interviews. it was one of the hardest decisions i ever made. i certainly could not take on both jobs. and i chose the latter. although it didnt turn out well and it left me another 5 months of being jobless.

those were hard times. i didn't have the strength to start anew. i spent a great deal of times (i'm talking about zombie days) in front of the computer. chatting endlessly. blogging. friendster-ing. going out and spending a quite part of my savings. but it was not all that bad.

on the other hand, i also learned a lot of things. some parts of myself that i would have never discovered had i not been a bum for some time. it also gave me the opportunity to reconnect with old friends and gain new ones in the process. i was able to participate in a lot of volunteer activities, meet new people, learn new skills and i realized that there really is a whole lot of the world left to be explored and conquered. had i not made that choice, i may not have met my babuy who makes me feel giddy all over whenever i think of him or when i am with him.

i guess my point is that whatever choice we make, what is important is how we make the most out of it.

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so live life without regrets! go for whatever that makes you happy! never be afraid! you can't discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore, because only those who risk can tell how far they can go.

think happy thoughts! Ü